1. HAPPY BIRTHDAY, TESLA!!!

2. I have a super-nifty Remix title, but I'm having trouble really making my intent and interpretation obvious. Whatevs, it's not due 'til Sunday.

3. I'm in the cafeteria at the Vancouver transit depot, watching one of the new "Canada Line" (fuck it, it's all SkyTrain to me) trains pull in to a station by the airport--the station I'd be getting off at if I still worked at UPS. It's a funny, circuitous world sometimes.

4. A couple of guys from Oklahoma had to travel to Ontario to get killed by a tornado. I shit you not, people.

eta: 5. Fuck research, Christ on a cracker. Gimme the name of a middling-to-shitty Chicago club/bar that was open in 2004.


GBBB: 16312/28000. Ten days before drafts due, lol.

1. I keep forgetting how draining being in uniform for fourteen hours can be, ugh bleh grar. Add being home right after work on a Thursday (my Monday) for the first time in a month, and you get me skipping the queer community centre meeting tonight. I fail, it's true. I shouldn't have come home in between. Oh well.

2. A funny thing happened over on Fetlife yesterday. One of the board members of that group for which I used to veep messaged me and asked "has the burnout passed yet?" Fortunately (or not, I'm unsure) it's not the same person who kept e-mailing me with questions about stuff six months after I quit. I just--I don't know, guys. I think the fact that my first instinct was to send NO THE BURNOUT HAS NOT PASSED FUCK OOOOOOFF as a reply says something important. Yes? Yes.

3. Call to protest, via undeconstructed:

What: Protest the exclusion of transsexual and intersex women (as well as any other woman who doesn't have whatever they define as "female physiology" and "life experience") from Lu's Pharmacy!
Where: Meet outside of Carnegie Hall (Hastings and Main)
When: Saturday, July 11th, 2009. Show up at 10am. We move over to Lu's at 10:30. Don't be late!
Sundries: The media will be present, and this will be video-recorded. If you do not want to be filmed, bring an extra T-shirt, or a long-sleeved shirt - just make sure the neck isn't too wide. We will show you how to turn it into a mask (don't worry, the shirt will be fine afterwards).
Background: "Women's only pharmacy offers safety, comfort;" "Transgender activist opposes Downtown Eastside pharmacy ban." :////
Facebook: A group!

I kind of need to do a mix with Patrick's cover of "Tom Traubert's Blues" and Ella Fitzgerald's "Basin Street Blues." This mix is not that mix.

This mix is: I was scrolling around my iTunes, randomly clicking on things, and the first half of this mix happened. The first three songs and a few of the rest are closing tracks (including the closing track). Take that as you will.

( exanimate: destitute of animation; spiritless; disheartened. [R.] 'pale...wretch, exanimate by love.' --thomson. )

1. So long, and thanks for all the discos? Gosh, guys. My sympathies to the Panic folks out there (I'm sure there will be pain in the house of the ex tonight).

2. In response to all the "IS SPOCK GONNA HAFTA CHOKE A BITCH" icons, with the cap of Spock, eh, choking a bitch? I would like an icon, same cap, that says "APPARENTLY, YES." Seriously, fandom: asked and answered.

3. Started roughing out Patrick and Anna's breakup for "Document." It sucks, in all the ways.

5. I want to see STXI again. Alternately, I can has a Harry Potter yet?

6. Oh hey guys, keep posting about Adam Lambert and Kris whatever his last name is (Allen? I want to say Allen for some reason). I totally went to queer youth group and high school, respectively, with those guys (not them specifically, of course, duh, you know what I mean), and I totally missed them. *huuuuuuugs for R and C, wherever they are*

7. On my way to a semi-work/union meeting, whatever. Laters.

Okay, so the Xtra West site is failing spectacularly this morning, but I wanted to post about a community meeting that's happening on Thursday, July 9 (that's this Thursday).

With the relocation fail, and consequent rebranding of The Centre as "Qmunity" (does it sound like a marketing firm made it up? Oh good, 'cause that's exactly what happened!), it's become abundantly clear that it's time to build a queer community centre where everyone gets a seat at the table--a collaborative style of management and growth modeled on the Vancouver Jewish Community Centre, among others.

On Thursday, July 9, please come and get your seat the table. Meeting's at Pulse Nightclub (1138 Davie St.), 7PM. (Warning: this is being "presented" by XW, so expect grandstanding, hardcore porn, and cigarette ads.)

Accessibility: there is a ramp-style entry to the building, but I have not been inside so I don't know about stairs, bathrooms, etc.

1. It's really kind of amazing to find a new person who, you know, they lift their arm and there's a spot right there for you and it's just right. Now I can has threeeeee (...to whom I'm still speaking, lol).

2. Late-night music-listening last week resulted in a mix called "Exanimate." I don't know if I want to share it, but I will, 'cause I'm a completist.

3. I keep leaving school-type things too late (by, like, two days, or a week), and I think my subconscious is at work here. Stupid subconscious--get out of my way, dammit.

4. Been trying to replace my internal invective towards other people ("idiot!" "Assface!" "A pox upon you!" etc.) with metta phrases ("may you be happy;" "may you be well;" etc.). It's hard, and when I'm really, really angry at someone, trying to do lovingkindness at them in my head just makes me want to cry, like there's a wall missing between what I'm feeling and what I'm doing, if that makes any sense. Anger as a defense mechanism to keep people from seeing they've hurt you, o rly Beejay? No wai.

5. The poison of mindfulness: once you've started, you CAN'T STOP. AGH.

Variation on a meme via sarken.

1. Pick something I've written whose ending left you with unanswered questions (fic here and here and here).
2. Leave a comment on this entry telling me what you've chosen asking me the questions.
3. I will write back with three possible "what happens after" scenarios answers.
4. Copy this to your journal. Optional meme is optional.
5. Solid gold.

I'll actually do this one, guys! I will answer any and all questions! Because it doesn't require picking songs or thinking up in-character bad dreams or killing people.

And now I have to go to work, bye!

I'm updating from my phone, having dinner at New Second Favourite Taqueria (second fave because they are veggie-only and First Favourite Taqueria has really good beef), where the margaritas are tasty and the music is Cream and Sonny Rollins and Muddy Waters. Soon is dharma class with Hot Yoga Instructor. Fantastic. If only I had a book or some amazing new fic to read, or a notebook so I could write. Oh well. *buries nose in margarita and old newspaper*

(Aw, there are long-haired Drive lesbians on their first date at the next table. Adorable.)

1. I want to see this movie where Johnny Depp robs banks. Like, a lot. I would probably go see it instead of seeing STXI for a sixth time, in fact (Rafael and I watched The Bourne Supremacy last night, lol Karl Urban. I kept making, "Dammit, I'm an assassin, not a doctor!"-style jokes, because I'm awesome like that. "Russia is corruption and strippers wrapped in concrete and snow." Etc.).

2. I submitted my summary for genderbendbb. There's not really a lot to say about that (it's a pretty awful summary, even for me), but I am making the O.O face right now, fyi.

3. Craving Chinese or Thai, seriously. We tried to have Chinese last night, but the place we like over on Columbia was closed for the holiday, which ALWAYS HAPPENS when we try to go there without the 'rents, ugh. Anyway.


GBBB: 14696/30000 28000, loooooool. eta: I'm bad at math, whatever.

I fail at time management. Chris Pine, take me away from all this.

Happy Canada Day (ugh, I don't like nationalism, but I do love living here, and it is the best place on Earth, even if I wish the government would stop using my tax dollars to tell everybody else that so they'll relocate their corporate offices to downtown Richmond, buy a few Mercedeses for their company fleet, and lease some executive penthouses on False Creek, because BC being the best place on Earth is my personal opinion! It shouldn't be government policy! UGH, FRIENDLY CANADIAN FASCISM).



Via nixwilliams.

eta: Matthew Good never gets invited to Canada Day parties, because he insists upon talking about child poverty.

The end.

PS: I am looking forward to the "What a Catch" video, even though I a) don't think it should be a single (ugh, srsly, wtf), and b) the video in my head is way better than whatever nautical tomfoolery they've decided to go with (this is quite often the case with FOB videos, actually--hire me for that directation job thar, Pete!).

Two oldish/obscure FOB interviews: Joe (December 2003; notable for Joe wanting you to say no to heroin!!!), and Patrick (February 2005; notable for being conducted during the UK tour where Pete wasn't, and also for Patrick being a rambling rambler who rambles and makes no sense. And Prince).

I suppose it's good I found these, not just 'cause they're neat, but because I went to put them in my FOB ma.gnolia, and discovered that ma.gnolia is no more. It would've been nice of them to e-mail me with this news. At the address I supplied to them every time I logged in to the damn thing. Ugh. So many random interviews, gone. And some good non-LJ fic, too. Bleh.

In another vein: "Sizeism in Fandom - My Thoughts," a post prompted by an spn_j2_bigbang story that I saw, upchucked a little over, and then didn't say anything about. I'm wondering why I didn't, now.

(Also, tiiiiiny quibble with the above post--she says we talk about gender in fandom, but we don't. We really don't. Recently, somebody posted a whinier version of my ancient open letter regarding "genderswap"--??? We don't talk about gender in fandom. We talk about sexism, feminism, misogyny, gender in our source texts, and whatever the fuck "community of women" means, but we don't talk about gender in fandom itself. If we talked about gender, we wouldn't be talking about cisgender women all the time. Just saying.)

( note to self: regarding october trip. )

I need a "gender rights are human rights" shirt. And this one.

NEW MATTHEW GOOD, oh my gosh, boer is my favourite person today. It's called "The Vancouver National Anthem," because he's a subtle man full of subtlety, and you can listen to it here.

( lyrics. full of subtlety. and sense-making. )

Ta da, my city. *magician hands*

It's kind of interesting how I can recognize Goodish turns of phrase now (I think I'd know this was his song from the words alone, or if you played me just the guitar riff, and that's sort of nutty and creepy), and how this song makes me think of the orchestral enormity of a lot of Avalanche, "21st Century Living" in particular--"Around here, ambition throws a non-perishable food item in the donation bin at Christmas, and then pats itself on the fucking back because it thinks it's done something decent." But it's also got the White Light/Hospital Music lyrical stream of consciousness/image-building thing going for it (granted, knowing a large part of his catalogue by heart helps to decipher things at this point, lol I have no life), and the pointed, particular guitar parts, which I'm so glad he learned how to do and which fill up so much of the Dave Genn-shaped gap (ugh Dave Genn go away).

Unspecified Date in Fall 2009 cannot come fast enough! I wants a new album, M. Good!

1. I keep forgetting that I feel way better and am generally a more likable human being when I've had a shower in the morning (weird, but true). Especially when there is pretty much no chance I'm having anything more caffeinated than keemun.

2. Re: fandom warnings debate (iteration nine million and four). ( Cut because I am not saying anything original or constructive. )

Anyway. Whoo, Buddhism-inspired meta and unnecessary information about my food allergies?

3. My Everwood s2 DVDs came. I still need to finish re-watching s1. I'm going to cry so much, ugh. Stupid show.

4. Saw STXI again with my dad and Rafael on Monday night. That shit does not get old, seriously. I wish Nu Trek fandom weren't being all het and Kirk/McCoy, though. It's hard out here for a shipper! (Not really; I know where the good old school shit is.)

5. Don't talk to me about Fall Out Boy's "swan song." I'm not interested in what Wentz is selling today.

6. Why do I fail at interpersonal relationships? A question for the ages.

1. Yes, I am counting the Artist Confidential transcript towards my GYWO pledge, what of it?

2. Let's see if yoga twice a week (plus meditation/Buddhist studies with Hot Yoga Instructor) improves my summerhate blahs.

3. No, Failblog, this is not fail. Original trilogy!Darth Vader would totally be into creative anachronism.

4. "Lake Fever" - The Tragically Hip.

We can take it a little bit further--
we can stick to the after-effects part.
Not trying to make you a believer,
don't want a little piece of your heart.

1. I'm about seventeen minutes into the FOB Artist Confidential transcript. Joe and Patrick need to stop talking over each other, Jesus fuck. Also, having done a few of these (I only finished the Peterick Podcast one, though), I've noticed Patrick has an adorable little habit of forgetting small words--"a" and "in," and things like that. It's annoying to transcribe, but ugh. So cute.

2. Here's a fannish thought about Andy Hurley that I've had for a while but keep forgetting to post, regarding his "anarchoprimitivist" politics. ( Or is it 'anarchosavagist'? Idk, whatever, zealous The End Is Nigh!!! people bore me. )

3. Working on "Praise You" right now, 'cause that's what wants working on. I think I might have to change the summary from "Patrick knows everything" to "Patrick is more fucked up than Pete, but gets laid even less." Is that too self-referencey? Are people who haven't read "Lord Knows" even going to read it? Important questions.

I know a few people out there are keeping on top of the situation (read: horror show) in Iran. In the interests of information-sharing, here are some relevant blog posts from that musician I like a lot:

"Eruptions in Iran" (Posted shortly after Ahmadinejad declared victory.)
"The Political Earthquake" (Regarding June 15's 100 000-person protest, where people were shot.)
"More On Iran" (An attempt to continue gathering information, despite the curtain falling.)
"How The Election Was Stolen And Who Stole It" (See title.)

Just hit up the main blog page and scroll down to see a few others (plus a neato post about James von Brunn and domestic terrorism).

Dear Remixer,

I hope you check my LJ for this, rather than assuming I will post it to the lounge comm, because I don't roll with that group psychology stuff. In any case, I also hope we got matched on a fandom or fandoms you're actually excited about writing, and that you don't hate my stories, etc. I'm pretty sure I have plenty of gen-to-ship/vice versa comfort room in all of my fic, in case we don't share favourite pairings or whatever. Uh. Pick any story you like (or more--I've totally smushed two stories together for Remix, lol, that was a good year), and have fun.

Best,
BJ

---

Dear Remixee,

Oh god, what have I done.

...No, don't worry, it's all good. I got this. *winning smile*

o.o

Omfg,
BJ

1. Cryptic BJ is annoyed. And cryptic. Smug superiority doesn't look good on anyone (guess what: nobody gives a shit about your academic cred). I'd laugh at you, but your self-righteous victimhood would only gain ten points. Fuck off and die.

2. Yoga toniiiiiiiight, yay.

3. New Our Lady Peace is so-so. I'm glad they're still around, anyway. First favourite band, represent.

4. I think this block I'm going through has to do with trying to tell myself what I am and am not allowed to write. Stay tuned for random ficlets of embarrassment.

5. I got my hands on the Sirius Artist Confidential hour(ish)-long thing FOB did recently, and it is so awesome. Joe and Andy actually talk a lot, and Patrick and Joe and the interviewer gab on and on about music, and the interviewer just doesn't know what to do with Pete 90% of the time (to be fair, Pete's obviously trying to fuck with him a bit). And Pete says Patrick is the sexier of his wives, because "Pete" starts with "P" and that stands for "pander." Anyway, if you can DL it, do (from the b-side to the other place). If not, I'll up it. I'm thinking about doing a transcript as well. Thoughts?

1. I have about twenty comments I need to reply to, sry. I will get to that soon. My head has been in places for a while.

2. If you DLed the PXP mix I posted the other day, you should probably make sure you have the correct Sherwood track on the Pete playlist ("The Only Song," not "Song in My Head;" idk, guys, they're even from the same fucking album. Who teaches kids how to title songs these days, seriously? Ugh. The worst part might be that I only even know about them because of goddamn William Beckett, whom I only know about because of Whatsisface Wentz. BANDOM ATE MY TASTE IN MUSIC BUT GAVE ME PATRICK STUMP). The zip and track download were wrong, but now they're both fixed. Sorry. Again.

3. No Sweat are liquidating their online store in an effort to survive the next few months. Please go by and buy some stuff from my favourite online retailer. Fair trade/fair labour, often organic, sometimes vegan things of all kinds for ridiculously low prices. They're sold out of cruelty-free un!Chucks, unfortunately :/

4. I'm going to see STXI with my dad and maybe Rafael in the next couple of weeks (this will be viewing number five, tying this movie with the original Rescuers for most number of times I've seen something in theatre). I think Dad will like it, but he might miss Shat too much (his first question was, "Do you think the new guy is as tough as Kirk was?" I'm like, "Uh, well, he mostly wins fights by being able to take a good beating? Some outwit/outlast strategy, you know." And he's like, "So, he's exactly as tough as original Kirk, lol." ♥)

5. Going on an impromptu (for me) minibreak in July to a guesthouse at a converted train station in Mara, BC. There're some lakes and a river and probably there will be canoeing and hours and hours of wet, sunburned, bug-bitten children. Should be nice. I'm gonna DL a bunch of Trek books to Tiny Laptop and take my new swim trunks.

6. Checking out Richard II at Bard on the Beach with my little brother on July 14, I think. The schedule this year is super-annoying, and trying to accomodate both my brothers is hard.

7. PORN. Accidental/experimental!d/s is totally one of my bulletproof porn kinks, and this triptych here? Is the good shit, oh my gosh. Have some. Zachary Quinto/Chris Pine (AKA Pointy-ears and Captain Fine from STXI): "You Know I Don't Ask for Much," "Hit the Floor," and "Work It Out" (eta: Okay, no, wait, I have to tell you guys the truth, 'cause that's how we roll. The last one is kind of fluffy and hearts and rainbows and ~*~*~NEVAR FALT LYK THIS B4~*~*~, but whatever. In between that stuff, it's pretty hot). NC17 and RPF, duh.

THE END.

Okay, since I just created a new PXP playlist called "It's A Motherfucking Dance Party," I guess it's okay to reveal this ridiculousness. Started sometime in late 2007, completed last summer, hidden from very nearly all the world until today (uh, I'll also take this opportunity to use my patented Cheesiest Icon Ever).

It's cheesy, it's cliched, it's redundant: it's my PXP fanmix (version one).

( pxp: a fanmiximnaf a. )

Crappy artist listing graphic is crappy! \o/