(This entry brought to you by: the last two episodes of the Savage Lovecast and Twitter.)

1. Okay, the thing that bugs me most about this whole "women's sexuality is fluid!!! So lesbians won't always be lesbians and vice versa versa!!! It are proved by the sciens!!!" thing is that a) shut up, and b) it sounds like just another round of dictating female sexuality and sexual identity and stealing female sexual enfranchisement and saying teh vagineh make us flakie (no, it's the Crisco). Also, c) what about those of us who might have been assigned, raised, and bodied as female, but don't identify as such? Is "women's" gender identity fluid too??? What about those of us who've taken corrective steps? What about those of us who are men??? Also, also, d) stop giving the "I don't believe in homosechality" idiots fuel for their stupidity fires.

Lastly, and I feel this is my strongest and most eloquent argument: e) shut up.

2. Gay men are not special. The end.

3. Which isn't to say I don't like gay and/or queer men (holla), 'cause yes, obviously, I do very much, just. You know. They're not special.

4. And now for something completely different:

# 20:54:49: a party animal or something kinda flamboyant like a seahorse @moony6 I'm just reading a book and now I'm curious. What animal are you?
# 21:10:24: RT @josh_patton: @petewentz Seahorses are androgynous. How fitting.

Oh my gosh, stop it Pete Wentz. And you too, Josh Patton. Whoever you are. Besides a big honkin' enabler.

(I know the FOB bits of bandom are getting withery, but, okay, I also know some of you still give a crap. Would anybody besides me read Pete ageplayin' as a tween girl? Obviously written by me, lol. Who the fuck else would write that shit.)

5. Right! Time for some more Taylor Mali! "Like, You Know?/Speak with Conviction" (don't get so excited about Mos Def you miss the first bit of the piece, which is sort of what happened to me) and "The Impotence of Proofreading" (HILARIOUS and TRUTHY and YESYESYES).

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1. If they weren't twenty dollars for three, and I hadn't already bought estrellada her Xmas present: mirror silhouettes (stars and swallows). Maybe for a birthday. Maybe for ME, even.

2. Sometimes I wish I had a ferreals sekrit journal for posting things I think are funny and true, but would probably just worry people I know IRL.

3. I had this corny impulse to record a voice entry of "Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas," but, you know, the thing about impulses is that they're temporary. So have some Kermit thee Frog instead.

4. 'Kay, I was totally not in the mood for what #1 and #2 on my radio presets were playing on my way home, so I put on the Virgin Radio re-cast (with Ryan Seacrest, zomfg), and Adam Lambert was playing, and I started daydreaming about a leatherdaddy!Patrick/"Subtlety"-verse snippet where Pete changes his Patrick-specific ringtone to "For Your Entertainment," because he's a little shit and also because it's funny, and then he can't find his phone at Patrick's house one day, so Patrick calls it, and some epic D: and :||| ensue. And then I remembered I was driving and decided to focus on that instead. THE END.

5. Lololol, okay, the keyword for this icon is "and an ipod," and I just realized that I DID get an iPod for Chanukah.

...So where's my Chris Pine?

...Maybe that's my answer to the eternal "what movie should I watch??? The house and all its media are belong to MEEEE tonight" question. Since I've already taken care of the personal entertainment and made a big mess, oops, not.

6. Anyway. I'm seeing Robert Downey, Jr. Better Have a Swordcane in Sherlock Holmes and Jude Law's Fantastic Fucking Eyebrows (I watched Sleuth the other day, oh my shit) tomorrow with my big brother, and you're not, so there. Well. Maybe moizissimo is. With her big brother, who is probably actually related to her. Still. The vast majority of you are not doing anything resembling what I am doing tomorrow, and what I am doing tomorrow is awesome. Also, I have pre-purchased the tickets, because being prepared is awesome as well. So there. I win. \o/

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1. Happy Solstice!

2. I feel one of the problematic (and also AWESOME) things about bandom (all the types) is that you kind of don't even have to write a lot of the really amazing things. Because eventually even the story about Pete getting his nose broken will happen IRL, at least partially.

3. Taylor Mali, my new favourite poetry boyfriend, tells/reminds us "What Teachers Make." Yay teachers and librarians and aides!!!

4. Patrick (Part Deux II) at I will be rockin' it on the transit today, oh yes. And also the treadmill, if it's raining and I can't take an actual walk.

5. There is no five. This entry just seems really short. I'd go find something random to fill it out, but I have to get to work. Sigh. Laters, gators.

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1. IPOD. NEW IPOD. FOR ME. FROM IOWA. heyginger is the beeeeeeeeeeeeeest, and not only because she facilitated the UPS guy arriving during my party last night and inspiring many, many porn jokes, etc.

2. ...I threw a Chanukah party last night and it was fun! I would like to have company more often! Just needs to be the right kind of company, I guess.

3. Had a bit of brainfail in the middle of things. I feel terrible, but I apologized and got forgived, so I'll live.

4. The red band tattoo will be a bit like this (Supernova Remnant SN 1006), just to keep things visually interesting (the silver-platinum thread running across/along is perfect). Soon.

5. I'm taking a shower and then going to London Drugs to buy Patrick (Part Deux II) a Pelican water resistant case, hell yes.

6. But first, and lastly: bb have another slice of pie is right, jfc. I stuck with him through the puffy vests, the ill-advised scruff, and the fuck-ugly glasses. I don't think I can stay on the Stump bangwagon if he's got no cushion at all. *dismay*

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Links for Friday:

+"Sold Anything: You can be and are." An MGblog post about the overwhelming popularity of military-themed wallpapers for phones and desktops.

+"Details in the Fabric" - Jason Mraz ft. James Morrison. Hang on, help is on the way. I am doing everything.

+Argyle dog bones. ♥

+Pete's desk at Crush. I never wanted to read Pete/Bob McMFLynn before, but.

+The Geminid metero shower is happening right now. Tried to watch it the other night, but there was too much light pollution. Video.

+"When Punks Turn into Politicians: Two members of one of Toronto's seminal punk bands from the 1980s now are willing to spend their days putting up with all the droning and terrible style sense endemic to the House of Commons. "What gives?" I wondered." Lols abound.

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1. I'm really, really sad I can't buy MCR's version of "All I Want For Christmas Is You." Sure, Canada has equal marriage, but I want the sooooong.

2. I like David Gray. I'm a fan. I often forget this, and then something comes on the radio and I'm like, "Dude! David Gray is pretty awesome!"

3. "Document" got recced a bit (by someone who's not on my flist!) and I realized that I never actually posted it anywhere but the Genderbend BB comm, lol. Is it too late to do that, do you think? *eyeroll*

4. I want to be posting snippets of the LTROI AU, but I'm not only writing it in my usual piecemeal but also a little bit backwards, and the only completed scenes of any length are at the end, and I don't want to ruin it for you. So no snippets yet. Maybe some snarky vampire!jailbait!Patrick later this weekend, though.

5. So I failed getyourwordsout. 42086 words so far, with one month left. My pledge was 200K. I really thought I wrote more than that without special effort? I think I haven't written as much as I have in the past, though. I'm not in any first-flush fandom, and I think I might be one of those annoying fertile/fallow writers, where I have long periods of productivity (not necessarily periods of finishing things, mind you) and long periods of not so much productivity. Oh well. At least I'm poetry-ing again. I'd be content with writing and completing one piece of fiction a year if I could write poetry at the pace/level I did in college. Insert whiny rant about why-oh-why did my ex-meds' permanent brain chemistry alteration have to happen to my words. WHY OH WHY.

ANYWAY. I'm babbling, so I'm gonna go. Laters, gators.

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I'm alive. These things have facilitated my state of continued existence:

+Actors pose as past characters. I love. All the team/couple ones made me go "awwwwww" (or, um. Can the HP trio just come over and do me? Like. Seriously. Or we could just watch movies, either way). And Matt Damon is ridiculously amazing, even though we're on a break (dude, seriously, you don't make an American sports movie about rugby in South Africa, okay? You especially don't cast two American big-name actors as Nelson Mandela and the team captain. Hollywood: failing to learn from racefail for almost one hundred years!). Also, Sam Neill ♥.

+The Neverending Story is coming out on Blu-ray in March. \o/

+House last night was pretty good. Not enough Joshua Malina (never enough Joshua Malina!), but plenty of House And Wilson Are Married (And Wilson Needs A Therapist), so that's all right. Speaking of therapists, I miss Andre Braugher. Somebody needs to give that genius a steady job on the teevee, okay?

+If you're looking to waste a few hours of your life learning about public transit, No Fares is a really good series of articles and interviews--the whole point is advocating and proving the viability of fare-free transit (AKA: Actually Public Transit), so if you're not into that, it might not be for you. I enjoyed it, in any case.

That is all. I need to figure out what I'm getting my dad for his birthday.

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1. I watched all of Firefly (yes, even the episodes I hate!) and Serenity this weekend (because my concept of steampunk has less to do with Victorian fashion and more to do with cowboys. And spacships, I guess. Um. I'd read a Firefly steampunk AU in a heartbeat, just saying; Kaylee in goggles? Yes or yes?). My brain is sort of fried, but in a good way.

2. And then, after the movie, I downloaded obsessive24's brilliant, scary-awesome, sort of subversive Mal/River vid "Body," because it's all of those things I said.

3. And then I went on a bit of a spree and discovered they'd also done an SPN s1-4 vid to MGB's "Fall of Man" (embedded in linked entry; Dean and Castiel character stuff and Dean/Castiel, but not romantical-like), and then I watched that, and then I died. It's so good (because it's one of my favourite MGB songs, and because Nicky is stupid talented, and because it's like nine different things I could never put into meta, and because the Ayn Rand bit they quote is one of the reasons I can't completely write off Ayn Rand). SIGH.

(There's an older SPN vid by somebody else to that song, but it's kind of iffy and hurts my soul, so.)

4. Last night, I had a really tasty scene and a half, and I got to watch my favourite hot brother in a really short skirt (and hold her sword-cane, yay), so, you know, my life is pretty awesome at the mo. *smug smile*

(I just decided I need a shirt that says "my brother is hotter than yours," and then realized at least two reasons why that's a terrible idea. Serves me right for being smug, I guess. *facepalm*)

5. To make my life more awesome, I need to answer a couple of e-mails (for work/union and volunteer shenanigans), and schedule some cuddling and negotiation timez sometime next week. Woot.

That is all! I've been informed that there's a Spencer Reid on my TV, so I should go attend to that.

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1. Oh, dude, UK Mac/PC commercials. The later ones are the best. "The Naughty Step" is my faaaaaavourite.

2. I've decided to go for Lulu with Melodramatic Ninny (the poetry collection I've been "working" on for about five years now). I'll throw it up, people can do whatever, and then when I have the time and money, I'll make copies by hand.

3. That said--does anybody want to read some stuff and give me a cover blurb? The text box on the back cover is fucking huge, and I'm not filling it up talking about myself or my writing.

4. Guiyaki Mate is good shit, but way too fine for my tea ball. Gritty tea gives BJ sadfaces :(((

5. OH HEY GUYS, I found a puppy hankie at the craft store yesterday :D

6. Enough dithering! I have things to do today!!! Steampunk things!

eta: 7. One last dither: "Barbie Eat a Sandwich" - Care Bears on Fire. Oh my god, adorable. The singer has braces. *___*

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1. Okay, I'm not in AI8 fandom (or whatever it's called now, don't care, just give me the porn), and obviously my opinion doesn't matter (nor should it!)--not that either of those things has ever stopped me from having or expressing an opinion before--so, anyway, here's my opinion: I'm less in favour of cheating than your average person (thus: polyamory), but it's really annoying to be reading a perfectly good story and stumble into a random telephone conversation with Katy Allen inserted for the sole purpose of showing she consents to Kris and Adam doing it. That is all.

2. When you're not sure if the sappy thing you're thinking would be appreciated said aloud? Put it in a poem! I feel this is a grand tradition dating back centuries. Sappy things make excellent poetry.

3. Headache-be-gone tea is amazing, omg.

4. Average Cats is anti-lolcat macros. Written by cats to spread cat lies and make us all stop paying so much attention to cats' nefarious doings. VIKING CAT WILL TOTALLY PILLAGE YOUR VILLAGE. LOOK AT HIS HAT, FOR THE LOVE OF MIKE.

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Links!

*Big Huge Thesaurus. Omg so amazing. I have this labeled THESAURUS REX in my Firefox toolbar, 'cause it has: synonyms, antonyms, definitions, sounds-like, rhymes with, etc. etc. etc.

*While seeking a cog-shaped cookie cutter, I found Fuel for the Boiler: a Steampunk Cookbook. I KNOW, RIGHT. Apparently there's a sequel in the works.

(No, I'm not making cog-shaped cookies for Saturday. Probably.)

*Iron-on transfer pen. HOTT.

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Ivan E. Coyote comes back (only about halfway, but still) from the "butches and femmes go together like hydrogen and oxygen all the time 4evaz!!!" failcliff with her most recent Xtra West column: "Throwing in the Towel."

The next day, I hung the freshly hemmed and pressed sand-coloured velvet draperies in my living room, and stood back to appreciate how well they complimented the dark olive accent wall and the bone-white window trim.

What can I say? It has pretty much been five years since I have had a stable, solo, sexy roof over my head. I am nesting.

I sat at my desk and wrote: "Enjoying my new draperies like I do does not make me any less butch."

And again with the stream of comments. One of my friends wrote that butches are supposed to keep thoughts like that to ourselves. Someone said that draperies could be butch as long as there were no pink bows on them. Someone else suggested that we needed a word for a butch metrosexual. This began a longer discussion on the various types of butch, soft butch, stone butch, old school, fag butch, gentlebutch, dandy.

I should say that all of this was fairly good-natured, and everyone's feathers went for the most part unruffled, at least on the page. But something about the whole discussion bugged me, and it got me to thinking about it all.

The phrase "fragility of queer masculinities" gets tossed in, which makes me really happy. Nom nom, queer gendering, nom nom.

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I just spent an hour writing a comment on this post (about the One True Way to Write Kinkfic), when I could (SHOULD) be cozy at home with Rafael and some hot leek stew. Obviously, I need that "someone is WRONG on the internet" xkcd icon.

Except that they're not entirely wrong? Just--I don't know. The demanding, knowledge-ier-than-thou tone bugs me. I've been doing kink with other people pretty intensely for almost six years, and I don't think I know everything about it--certainly not enough to tell the whole of fandom how to write it properly/appropriately/safely. I barely feel qualified to do a Gchat consultation about kinky phone sex, lol.

IDK, IDK, IMMA GO HOME AND HAVE SOME LEEKS NOW, K? BYEE.

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Updating for the sake of it? I have a lot of things to do in the meat world, and I don't want to do any of them (not because they are unpleasant, but because I just generally don't like doing things), but the internet is failing at distraction (thanks!).

Oh, wait, these things:

+Sainthood is amazing;
+I bought the makings of a Chanukiya yesterday, whoo;
+I'm andchimeras at AO3, with BJ Garrett, allcanadiangirl, thepurpleswitch, and azurejay as registered pseuds. I think that's all of them, anyway. No works yet (see above, re: general dislike of doing things);
+Butchmilf is the cooking video blog of a friend of a friend of a friend, and she is adoooooorable. Also, informative!

And a question: if the tattoo I want to get is a ridiculously simple colour band around one arm, do I need to go to the Best People Evars, or would the Generally Highly-Recommended (Just Not By My Bodymod Guru) Folks be okay?

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1. My BND package isn't here yet. Customs :///

2. I'll live though, because! UP is the movie of my puppy/Junior Wilderness Explorer heaaaaaart.

3. ME: I was hiding under your porch. Because I love you. :DDD
RAFAEL: Oh right, that's where you came from! :DDD

4. I checked airfares to Chicago this morning, and just about made a mess in my pants. Seven-fifty round trip? NNNNGH. I have the week before wincon off, so I think I will go one or two days early, to facilitate exploration of the Leather Archives & Museum, and other wondrous things.

5. And now it is time for more O. Henry and bed. Nom nom, bed.

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Links to things which are composed of words:

1. "Where the Wild Things Were: Children of divorce, loneliness, and other magical things." After I saw WTWTA, I said it was childlike. I didn't mean happy unicorn funtiems, I meant this (children whose parents aren't divorced can have a similarly crappy time of it).

2. Via dragojustine: MYTHBUSTERS FIC. "Straight Man" by toft. It's sort of pre-slash, but not really. Oh god. Just read it, will you? Starts off kind of awkward and random, but totally hits stride a few sections in. I'm so excited about MB being a Yuletide fandom this year :D

3. This post concerns the death of Rafael's football team's goalkeeper. R's had a pretty shitty week because this happened (idk, Europeans and football), and it was really strange to see it pop up on M.Good's blog. WE ARE ALL CONNECTED. Or something.

4. The 4632 (not a "The 4400" spoof. Though it totally should be). My name is in there, somewhere off to the right, near the edge. I don't know why (theories abound as to where they got the names from, and I did sign up in the last two rounds of shenanigans, but there are a lot of people included who didn't, so), but the why is less important than the fact that FOB stole my cool again. Damn you, Fallout Boys.

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Also! I want to see Inside Hana's Suitcase this weekend. It's playing at Fifth Avenue tomorrow and Sunday afternoons. Anybody interested?

And, and! The Vancouver Holocaust Education Centre is having an exhibit about Canada and the 1936 Summer Olympics. If it wasn't horrible, it'd be funny. "More Than Just Games" is the title, for awesomesauce.

Okay, that's it. Laters!

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Fail, SPN. Massive fucking fail. Why do you keep playing me like this, baby? Ain't I been good to you?

In other, less faily news. Last night I had a dream that I went sailing with estrellada and jrope, which is bizarre because, like, I think we all like boats? But we're not serious sailors. Anyway, the boats were only two-person, so I ended up taking a boat on my own, and I still felt included and frienshippy and cared for and loved, etc. etc., and everything was fine and wonderful and very fun. YO DREAMSOURCE, TRY BEING A LITTLE SUBTLE NEXT TIME, 'KAY??? THX!!!

Whatever. Alexander Rokoff is my new favourite artist this week. Tasty, tasty Old Masters.

And now I have to go to work. Bleh. At least it's Friday.

PS: My tummy is itchy :///

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1. So Yuletide is having an amnesty year for people who've been bandinated fer defaultin in the past. I defaulted in 2006 or 2007, and I'm wibbling about signing up this year. Skimming the fandoms list, I can totally see some things I can offer as a writer, so. Idk. I kind of want to do it just to have done it, and have the slate clean so it's not this black thing hanging over my head: I had a shitty winter one time and defaulted on Yuletide oh nooooooes. You know.

Anyway.

2. If you don't know who Rachel McKibbens is, you're missing out! estrellada introduced me to her a while ago with this spoken word duo piece (can I claim "dirty little stepbrother" as a role? I think that should totally be allowed!). So, yes, I Youtubed her the other day, and this piece, "Central Park, Mother's Day," actually made me cry. Nom nom, spoken word, nom nom.

3. In the real world, I am tired of getting my hopes up for people I'm not already in love with. I'm scared of doing the math to see how many hours I spent writing the rules people are already breaking. I'm looking forward to a weekend full of strangers and learning and yelling. I'm already dreading coming back next week (but it'll be better if I can actually get a ticket for MG on Tuesday). My body doesn't feel good and I know exactly what's wrong and I need to close my eyes and do what's right.

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1. I think I've found the words for the shirt I'm gonna wear to my Matthew Good show next week: "It Starts Today (It Ends When I Say It Ends)." Nom nom nom artist brains.

2. I will not read the lyrics for "From Now On We Are Enemies." I WILL NOT. This is the last new FOB there will be for a very long time (ever, even), and I'm not fucking spoiling myself for it!!! Dammit.

3. kanata is awesome and now I have LTROI on my computron, and ugh. Pretty movie is pretty. I can't even get over the use of the snow and subtle audio and stark font on the opening credits to create a liminal space (never mind pointing out how I'm all about liminal spaces right now).

4. Relatedly, have a snippet.

( In which Patrick is fifteen, more or less. Pete is twenty. And...scene. )

*

Ugh. Who knew! My writing has unexplored potential for stiffness. Sigh.

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